My story

Its been awhile

2012-01-07T22:26:00.002+08:00

I haven't posted anything for awhile now.
So, O levels ended a little more than month back.

After that were the class chalets ( which were considerably fun ).

Then,I finally joined a fight club @ boat quay. The juggernaut fight club is pretty alright I suppose, not the best but it'll do. The guys there are nice, the coaches are fun. Training is tough enough. Guess I'm sticking to this for awhile.

Recently, 2011 ended too. Spent the eve of new year doing nothing actually.

So here's new year's resolution.

Commit to training till March/April. Well, to be honest I have never been really able to commit to anything for long. So 3 to 4 months of training would do me good.

Stop smoking. Ha this particular one has popped up on almost every new year's resolution I've made. So here's the plan stop smoking till April and maybe, just maybe, pick up social smoking afterwards.

I have these two for now. No idea how poly is gonna be like, so that'll have to wait.

Well, haven't been attending training for close to 2 weeks now. Due to a certain boo boo during a fishing trip at kranji. I'm currently waiting for my wound (fishing hook to the back) to heal before I start training again. That should be one Monday which is the 9th.

Monday is also the day the O level result are released. Finger's crossed there.

If all goes well, under 10 points, Np business studies it is.

If not, oh well, kinda fucked.

2011-10-07T23:16:00.001+08:00

Hello devil, here's my soul.

2011-09-22T20:03:00.001+08:00

Fight team, wait for me. I'll be there just you wait

Prelim results.

2011-09-15T20:02:00.002+08:00

C.Humans- A2 (71%)

C.Science- A1 (78.5%)

Math- A1 (78.75%)

P.O.A- A1 (77.5%)

English- b4 (61%)

2011-08-09T23:14:00.001+08:00

2011-07-10T20:57:00.001+08:00

FUCK THIS SHIT. YOU'RE GOING DOWN.

Progress

2011-06-15T00:43:00.002+08:00

Here's yet another embarrassing photo.

After 2 weeks.

2011-06-14T22:51:00.000+08:00

ran 4.14km today and had an upper body session.

Review.

2011-06-13T20:56:00.003+08:00

Last week,completed 13.66km
had a upper body and core session.

I feel great today. I completed 10.3km in 1h 7 mins and still feel like a boss.

Prat Prat atap,

2011-06-09T00:39:00.002+08:00

Just reached home from a late night dinner at Al-Ameen with Hui yen and Zhi Ying.

before that complete 9.33km. I do apologize for the tasteless blog posts.

Skip,

2011-06-07T22:17:00.000+08:00

Completed 4.33km in the morning.

Skipped my evening run.

Review.

2011-06-06T22:25:00.002+08:00

Last week.

Had a lower body session and a core session.

Completed 20km.

Just finished a upper body session. Felt really weak today as though my arms are on holiday.

Felt worse than the last upper body session I had.

Oh ye' know,

2011-06-05T02:05:00.004+08:00

I would have left behind a note before I left,but, my hands were hurting so badly from the splinters that old wooden door so kindly provided.

That old wooden door that I've have been knocking on,often too forcefully. I don't curse at it for giving me splinters. Who would?

I'm not too sure why I did so too. Maybe It was just an urge to help the undying wails over at the other side,which may most possibly be a part of my wishful imagination. Maybe it was to feed my curiosity or my sense of achievement .Maybe I just wasn't thinking. I honestly Don't know.

2011-06-01T22:33:00.001+08:00

Completed 11km today. The evening breeze was cool and refreshing great weather to jog in.

2011-05-31T21:06:00.001+08:00

I'll sing the song of a sweet wrapper if you'd understand it.

oh, swing me gently.

2011-05-30T22:09:00.003+08:00

Tomorrow's the start of everything, from studying to training to every boring I guess.

Gosh,in my head it is still like, "C'mon call her up, we need company" , like "Damn, lets party the holiday away" and like, " Lets grab a pack and sit and slack" and finally like "Omg, tomorrow? lets start next week instead" .

I've finally done my holiday schedule, really really interesting/lively/eventful.

Here are the words found in it. "morning,jog,swim,train,revise,school."
Now aren't we just the most psyched kids around now.

So, I've also taken an embarrassing picture of myself after training today, as the start of my photo progress. I'll continue scaring people off the web by posting more photo progresses.
Probably every 2 weeks. Thus meaning another 2 pictures coming up this month.

Hopefully, by the end of the month I'll look less like a uncle who frequents the coffee shop to ogle at the beer girls.

Week one, 68.7kg. Felt like horse shit after 3.7km.

Total distance today:9km

back on track,

2011-05-30T12:08:00.002+08:00

Its bout time to do the things I'm suppose to do again.

The past few weeks has been fun for me and getting side tracked was surprisingly refreshing.

Alright, I guess its back to preparations for the upcoming exam (Prelims).

So, I've finished setting up the filter for my 4 feet tank and also completed my morning jog.

I'll post up a photo progress of my training later on in the night.

Hopefully, there be significant progress for that(after this month).

Also, I've yet to plan my June holiday schedule. Will attend to that by today.

I guess, everyday should be juggled between studies and fitness.

I'll have to think hard about how.

In a nut shell, this holiday will be different. It'll be the first productive holiday.

Now wish me luck.

Ouch

2011-05-29T00:18:00.001+08:00

My arm hurts like fuck

Thoughts of yesterday,

2011-05-28T21:46:00.003+08:00

Yesterday was a fantastic day with a rather rough start. My biological clock decided to screw around, woke up in the middle of the the night. Like literally mid-night, 12am. Laid there till 3, when I finally decide to give up on the idea of sleep , so black Black Ops it was.

Zombied my way to school to collect the holiday schedule. Zombied my way out of school before the end of term service. Went over to Lui's to grab some Taiwan goodies(The best tasting instant noodles) and also some "Ear-Wax-Removing-Straw-Thingy-Magic-That-Is-Suppose-To-Lighted".

I shit-you-not, it feels so freaking weird to have that "Ear-Wax-Removing-Straw-Thingy-Magic-That-Is-Suppose-To-Lighted" suck out all your ear wax. It claims to have therapeutic properties.

Met up with Liz (Li Zhen ) after that since I promised to let be her "model" which basically is her human guinea pig. So, not knowing what I got myself into, I hopped on the train with her to Clark Quay where her school is. Reaching there, she went on to prepare her station. I was asked to head in shortly afterwards. For those who says women can't stand pain? Nonsense.

For all I know, if they wax themselves, they CAN stand pain. So, yes, I got my armpit waxed.

I wonder how they can go for Brazilian Waxing or how guys can go for Boyzilion waxing.

Which is basically the waxing of the pubic area. Now, can you spell ouch?

Half a facial since Liz decided not to do a proper job.( No pun intended)

At the end of the day, Liz and her friends went to grab dinner while I went on to grab a pack.

Hopped on the train with Liz and her friends back to woodlands. I went on to play ball while they sat around in my condo. Liz left shortly afterwards.

Well, for some particular reason that is rather challenging to put a finger on, it was a very very enjoyable day. Perhaps it was because of the unusual company,which unlike the usual, has a carefree vibe to it.Or perhaps it was because of the therapeutic properties of "Ear-Wax-Removing-Straw-Thingy-Magic-That-Is-Suppose-To-Lighted" or the waxing experience. Nevertheless, thanks Liz, that is if you're reading this.

Off to hit the sheets

2011-05-27T22:08:00.000+08:00

Omg I'm so tired. Today was a great day. But I'm just way too Tired to process any thoughts now. Will get to that tomorrow. BAI

What's up duck?

2011-05-27T00:19:00.002+08:00

Have not posted for eons now. Mostly due to my recently developed laziness I suppose.

This few weeks have been rather eventful, of course with a sprinkle of over-dramatic and over exaggerated unpleasant surprises and one or two soul saddening events. I believe this post its gonna be pretty lengthy.

Anson is finally losing weight ( I hope so), his enlistment was just yesterday.Before that, we went to Universal Studio Singapore,on a particular Friday which I'm too lazy to recall, to spend his final few days as a civilian. It was fun, to a certain extend. Though after awhile, the rides(even the main attractions) got a tad bit too boring. The day ended with us smelling like foreign workers due to the mix of perspiration and water sprayed at us from a jet ski.

Anson later came over to my place for the weekend to help me transport and set up the two four feet fish tank which Mathew no longer wanted. Us being us, we spent Saturday fishing first.

Sunday was a very busy day. First up we went to take a look at both the tanks. Followed by buying the filters, sand and lighting for the fish tank.Sounds pretty easy but there were a lot of shops around so we spent a good half of the day comparing prices.Spent a good $200 on the day itself.

Then we had to do the transporting of the fish tank. Cleaning of both fish tank. Cleaning of the 20kg river sand. Managed to finish almost everything around 7.

However, life decided to be a bitch and Anson decided to be a smart ass, In the process of transport the lighting around he decided to leave the lighting upright. Of course the inevitable happened and one of the bulbs was smashed so we had to head over to the nearest DIY shop to get a replacement. But not before we found out that there was a chip in the corner of the tank causing water to slowly sip out of it. Thus we only manage to finish the fish tank at 11pm.

Mum came home on the following Tuesday and as expected created a great hullabaloo over the fish tank.In reply to that I simply ignored her. Not the most diplomatic choice of action but it did the job. From then on it was fishing and fishing and fishing. At forests ,pay ponds and more forests. Chicken soup for the soul yet it drains you to the bones physically.

Recently, has been a self proclaimed holiday. Haven't been heading to school for awhile now.

With the excuse of Mother tongue intensive going on. Though I'll have to start studying again in a week or so which Includes self revision. Also started with physical training with a few guys.Thus the major muscle cramps I'm experiencing now.

On a serious note, Just yesterday Sheena's Granny has been facing some serious problems.

Its hard seeing such a cheerful girl so sad. Well, there's nothing much for me to help with.

Just giving a helping hand when I can I suppose.I guess If I had a religion or I believed in god I would pray for her and her granny.

2011-05-11T22:57:00.003+08:00

Clown

Have you ever seen a sad clown?

Who's brightly painted face homes a doleful frown.

Who wears a wide grin across his face,

in an attempt to hide that lonely gaze.

Who jumps up and down, who clowns around.

Who makes you laugh. Oh he'll never stop.

But wait awhile, and let thoughts reconcile,

and you'll recall, that its just his job.

Have you ever heard a sad clown?

Who's cheerful laughter makes no sound?

Who laughs the loudest amongst the crowd,

in an attempt to mute the sorrow bellowing aloud.

Who goes on and on, for oh so long.

bringing laughter with his well known joke about purple tights.

But wait a minute and soon you'll see it,

the void in his life he is forced to fight.

Have you ever known a sad clown?

Who may just be living right in town.

Who is known as the one who never cries

Of course, its just a covering lie.

Who will never be down and out,oh the one we don't worry about.

But may I ask for just one favor?

Its not a lot, just feed your thoughts,

think if he could be one of your neighbours.

Written on the 11/5/2011

Tell me,

2011-05-10T21:59:00.001+08:00

If I were to disappear one day, Who would notice?I'm sick of chasing shadows.

Screwed up both math and physic paper today.

Fuck

what's up this week?

2011-05-09T19:24:00.002+08:00

I wish I had something interesting to share really. Life has been really mundane. There's nothing much to study for now a days. Except for my P.O.A which is on Thursday.

I'm not too confident on that.

On a lighter note, gonna head to Universal Studios on Friday. Can wait for the roller coaster ride.

Which I missed the last time I went due to some technical difficulties. Talk about so close yet so far uh?

Thats bout it I guess.

2011-05-08T22:10:00.002+08:00

Breaths that fights your lungs.

Words that bite your tongue

Laughter that brings extreme pain.

Threads that keep you sane.

Eyes that do not see.

Memories that do not leave.

Steps that go no where.

courage that does not dare.

Thoughts that never stop.

Head that burns so hot.

Seconds that are hardly fast.

Minutes they never pass.

Nights that you dread so much.
Days and days, apart.

Written on 4/1/2011

Just thought I dig up a poem from the past.

I'm glad I'm over that, Felt worse than being confined.

Everyday then was just, being a zombie.

Physics and Math paper on Tuesday.

Sucha bore.

A picture is worth a thousand words.

2011-05-06T22:40:00.002+08:00

Y'know that doesn't apply for mindless self taken snap shots of you in a toilet. Nor does it make sense when you stop at every other full length mirror at every other ordinary occasion to take a picture of who else, but yourself.

Had my Chem paper today, was rather difficult at first sight. However, after calming down, it was actually still back to the basics that have been drilled over and over again. I would expect to do well in that too .

2011-05-05T22:22:00.001+08:00

Had my S.S the day before and my history today.

Expect an A2.

Chem tomorrow.

2011-05-03T22:33:00.000+08:00

S.S paper tomorrow. I'm all done with memory work.

2011-05-02T22:09:00.001+08:00

GoodFreakingNight.

Aye aye captain.

2011-05-02T18:23:00.003+08:00

Haven't been blogging for awhile now.

Been studying a lot recently but not lately. Nothing too interesting to touch on.

Got few different predatory fishes in my tank. Had to isolate a certain species since they were too aggressive. Have yet to decide what to do with them though. Sucks that I don't have a bigger tank to work with.

Have had random thoughts of different kind of business that may interest me or that I may pursue in the future.

No harm noting them down for future usage or laughs.

Well, this whole fish craze got me thinking, Tropical fish breeder? Since Singapore is a rather steady platform due to the lack of seasons and the temperature being rather constant around the year. Its a shot in the dark since I'd probably know nuts about fish rearing, lets not go on about fish breeding. Just a thought to bookmark.

2011-04-23T11:16:00.001+08:00

FUCK I HATE DREAMS

2011-04-22T23:17:00.001+08:00

Hello, Where is everyone?

2011-04-11T21:51:00.000+08:00

I feel so guilty. I slept through this afternoon.

Rugby Finals

2011-04-07T21:17:00.002+08:00

Was not as interesting as last year but who am I to say so.

The guys in the field who have trained for days , shed the vast amount of blood and sweat for just this day itself, they deserve their rightful glory.

Although we lost, It was a good match all in all.

The big brother sec 5 led the cheers this time. Gotta feeling that the class will be quiet tomorrow. With all our voice gone of course.

Re-write my story

2011-04-05T20:58:00.004+08:00

I'm 17 this year, I feel like my age, finally.

I'm a free man with no intention of compromising my current status. Although occasionally, I really feel like giving those assholes a major facial make over.

This year for me is different. This year, for the first time in my life, studying is my first priority.

I'm still very much into fighting and hitting the gyms however time is an issue.

I probably spend close to 20 hours a week in the library & for once I sit in every lesson attentively.

I'm still trying my best to relate to girls.(those weird creatures)

but I guess I don't intend to find a little bitch to spice up my life at this point of time.

Oh, go kill yourself if you ever feel insulted by my mojo.

Give me a kick start

2011-04-04T19:49:00.002+08:00

Oh my, I feel so stuck. I need to work harder on my studies I swear.

Few more weeks to mid-years. Lets see which subs are mid-years ready by now.

English (Ready, I hope.)

Math (will start doing prelim papers this week)

Combine humans

- History (Not at all ready)

- Social Studies( have no idea whats coming out)

Combine science

-Chemistry(somewhat there)

-Physics( needs work)

Principle of Accounts( NOT READY AT ALL)

I need to work harder, I swear.

week 3

2011-04-03T20:45:00.003+08:00

The start of week 3. Mid way.

Am I Mid years ready? I doubt so. Hopefully I can complete more this coming week.

But here's some heart matters to settle

Dear you,

How have you been lately? I haven't spoke to you since the day we split. I've been fighting the urge to contact you since then too. I'm not typing this to tell you "I'm-over-you" nor is this a "please-forgive-me-and-allow-me-back" letter. This is just a few things that has been bottled in for way,way too long.

Truth be told, I still think about you. Sometimes a little too much for my own liking.

I still check your blogs and twitter for updates and sometimes I naively believe that you'll read mine too. Occasionally, I would try to picture us together as lovers and at times, as friends too.

But always It'd leave me with a void to fill. An urge to fight.

I have to admit, you got me for good with your little diabolical revenge scheme.

That was good.( Obviously not from my point of view).

Now, you must be thinking "its too late you fucking loser"

Well, I learnt that the hard way, don't worry.

I believe I still owe you an apology.

For being such a jerk. I'm sure I don't have to remind you how much an asshole I am.

So I'll save my brain cells on that. You know, they should come up with a word that means

" more sorry than sorry" because that would be appropriate right about now.

At the same time, I'll have to thank you.

For what you've done for me. For the time you gave me. (which you use to say,you'll never get back).But more importantly, for breaking up with me.

I'm way more focused now. The break up somehow kicked the fuck out of me.

Please don't take anything as an offence, but I don't think that I would be so task orientated if the break up had never happened. I'd probably be like the me last year and that would be called staying stagnant. You know I hate not being productive. I'm kinda glad it happened although the ending itself was pretty rough. Don't you think so?

Also, I have been dying to tell you this.

Please please please work hard on yourself. You have so many dreams to fulfill.

Don't screw up your life.(your body too, with that much alcohol)

I'm not trying to be self righteous. I just honestly wish you well.

In a nutshell,

I guess I'm here to say, thanks for letting me in your life.

And also for dumping this ass of mine so hard it hurts.

I'm regretful for what has happen and yet at the same time glad.Sheeesh, blame the mixed feelings. I doubt we'll be having coffee anytime soon but I hope we'll at least keep in further contact.

Love,
JOEL.

Such foolish thoughts. She left months ago.

2011-04-03T17:03:00.002+08:00

Just completed a math prelim paper.

Now I'mma gona bring shit to the grass outside my condo.

just a thought.

2011-04-02T22:42:00.002+08:00

mistakes are what shapes us.

Friday night

2011-04-01T22:27:00.002+08:00

Its a Friday. I stayed at home and lazed around instead of heading to the library. I refuse to study 7 days a week. Went down for the weekly game of basketball with the guys.

I swear I can't stand the IJC group.

They are,let me see, pretty god damn gay/soft/whiny & they gossip way way way too much.

Seriously? Play the mother fucking game? Instead of standing there, half way through a game and start yapping about the "guy in your CCA who thinks his better than you".Finish the god damn game.

Sheeesh, today was better. They came, some guy caught the ball with his face, "couldn't sneeze" and all of them left. I mean shit, you're a guy and this is a ball game, god damn it,you're sure to get smack by ball some day.Don't be a little bitch about it.Ah sheeeeeeesh. Best part? They ended up playing in the play ground.

Okay. Right.Wow.

Well, I'd better turn in now, extra lesson tomorrow morning.
Which sucks big time, Saturdays are meant to be started in the afternoon.

Oh wells, Still can't wait till this year end.

good o' 400

2011-03-31T20:47:00.001+08:00

Can't wait for this year to end.

Study

2011-03-29T20:52:00.002+08:00

Have been studying at the library after school, for a estimate of 4 hours almost everyday, the whole of last week.Yesterday and today too. Today was rather unproductive as compared to other days but I did manage to write up more notes at home. I'm pretty drained.

Last monday

2011-03-24T20:05:00.002+08:00

I'd say I enjoy sitting at home for most of the day.

Sat around till 4 or 5.

Headed over to Anson's, caught the movie Rango with Pei Hua and Anson.

Thats as eventful as it gets I guess.

On the other hand 3rd offshore trip was a blast.

Using the Skipper's,James, gear was way better than using or own.

It was literally a no fuss thing. No backlash, No need to waste weights, No need to wash the gear(since he does it himself) . The weather turn really wet once in awhile, but still enjoyable.

Pictures will be up once I get em

No-Emotions-just-events.

2011-03-22T21:08:00.003+08:00

Here's one of those.

Went to school. Hit the library after school till 6.3o. Had dinner by the bbq pit. studied till 8.

Visited the gym instead of running laps.

Studied for 4.5 hours.

Dreams

2011-03-21T20:27:00.005+08:00

Woke up last night at 4 when my dream got waylaid by reality of my empty bed.

The dream itself was a piece of art.

It was just another lazy day, one we were so familiar with.

We lay there, hands entwined, looking deep into each other. Smiles on our faces.

The day passed and the evening sun hung low. I'm unhappy, I hate it to have a day end so fast.

You asked if I'm tired. I am, however, I'm also fearful to close my eyes.

You closed your eyes and asked me not to worry. You gave a little chuckle, a chuckle I once heard so often. I felt at peace, the peace I always had when I'm with you. I guess its alright to close my eyes for awhile. Just for awhile. Thats alright.

I woke up in my dark room, for a moment I looked for you. Like how I once did.

Empty bed, obviously without a trace of you. My mind was racing to figure out where you went. Thats when reality kicked in.

Kicked me so hard It knocked me breathless.

Solitude has never bothered me, but at that moment, It engulfed me. Frightened me. Got me shaking. I've never felt so alone before. Never long for company so much before.

I wished that you'd magically appear. Like how I somehow still wish you could be here to get me through one more of these hard night.

Of cos' that'd be just a wish. Just like the one we made when we were 3, about fairies and unicorns.

for the assholes.

2011-03-20T20:31:00.005+08:00

Here's one out to them.

To certain people who had individual importance in my life.

Once upon a time.

Each one of em' who hopped on and off, 'friends' who left without a word.

Friends who stepped away, while you fight the waves that drift worlds apart.

Friends who left you there hanging, till your arms are sore and your soul,solid cold.

Friends who left without saying goodbye.

Friends.

Every wondered why its called "good bye"? Why there is a good in it?

How can saying (good)bye to a lover, a friend, a family, be a good thing?

Look at it this way, would you rather be holding on, fighting the inevitable growth of distance, of you and the ghost of your friend.

Or would you rather be told, hey I'm leaving?

Isn't it better to have an unpleasant ending than to stare at the dead end only to realize, everyone has left before you. Whats more a 'good' bye?

I'm not bitter.

I'm just saying, why don't you assholes give me a goodbye?

why not just say a goodbye?

Why not just tell whoever whom you plan to leave behind, "hey pack up"

Why not?

Oh, let me say

2011-03-18T22:56:00.002+08:00

Have you ever have so many thoughts that nothing comes out right?

You've repeated it so many times in your head but when you open your mouth, oh tongue-tied!

Or in this case, finger-tied.

Been wanting to blog about so many things just procrastination got the better of me.

So, Nothing for tonight cos' I'm mentally blocked.

Heading for an offshore trip tomorrow.

arrrreh'

2011-03-05T22:30:00.003+08:00

On this cold Saturday night, I sit at home with my busted knee(which decide to act up for no reason) accompanied by the ever present solitude. Feeling utterly disgusted at the wasteful day I spent today, I ponder about whats to come. I worry for the future and about my actions which at the end of the day will shape my path.

The words by my tuition teacher, served cold and hard across my face.

"6 more month till Os" was the repeating tape she deployed in my head.

6 more month to Os. 6? really? Fuck, didn't I start early? now I'm down to 6?

But there's still English to work on, Math papers to do. Past year's social studies to read up on.

Accounting concepts to cover. History? Chem? physics?

Wait? Didn't I start early? Shit.fuck.shit.

I'm going back to the 6 days study week after the march Holi's.

On the lighter note, a recap.

Met Pei Hua yesterday, Movie & dinner night.

Spent a great deal of time just talking about the small things in life we often forget to appreciate , the major events that shaped us, the current affairs that worries us.

Had a simple dinner at Burger King since Billy Bombers is way too pricey for my liking.

Of cos being a M&D night, there was the M after that.

We caught Adjustment bureau, which despite what review said "wasted by a lame plot", was pretty refreshing ,with a twist of science fi to the regular "boy meets girl story" definitely worth the money.

Scoop of art

2011-03-03T20:42:00.003+08:00

Thats the name of the ice cream parlour that Sam and me were studying in yesterday.

Nice place with mediocre food which was just slightly over priced and(most importantly) an eye candy for a boss.

I'm going back there next Wednesday! Had tuition like any other Wednesday.

Woke up this morning feeling juice-less as usual. School's like every day else.

Had 2 hours of self revision. Sent Sammy to the vets.

Went for my jog and I'm about to hit the sheets now.

O's in 6 months or so.

to buck up.

2011-03-01T18:54:00.002+08:00

Lost my momentum some where along those hard nights.

This is just a post to keep me on track.

March

-Fitness(by second week)

7 rounds with weighted gloves on Mondays and Tuesday.

16 push ups as basic.

9 pull ups to hit(Friday).

-Habits

Magic number one.

Haven't been keeping to the plan. sheeesh, pain in the ass.

But still the number is ONE. One stick a day.

-Studies

Get off holiday mood and start revision on S.S & math.

Most importantly work on English. Looking at 3 hours every weekday.

Some up coming events.

4th- Out with Pei Hua for movie and dinner night.

5th- Start of Saturday POA class

11th-Sports day/ Last day of term

12th- Interclass rugby

19th- boat trip

I'll scream cos' you know Al-Qaeda!

2011-02-28T21:28:00.003+08:00

Just came up from my jog and before that from my self revision of Social-Studies at the club house.

Dad came home knocking on my door this evening, disrupting my siesta, which he rarely does.

Turns out Sammy has a really bad spot of raw skin just below her eyes and a little scratch just on top of the same eye.

She has been rubbing her face on the grass field really vigorously for the past few days thus the results.Had to apply some iodine on her wound. which probably hurt her bloody lot. Had to hold her down while my father apply it as she was struggling too much.

Came and went, just like the dozen of other friends

2011-02-27T21:15:00.003+08:00

Pretty sick of being the one who values friendship.

Tsk.I wont grouse much.

Today,

Headed over to Lui's . Watched a movie called 'RED' was pretty good.

Hit the gym after that. thats about as eventful as it gets for today.

Oh also I totally stuffed myself with pizza for dinner.

And sheeeesh, no wonder I don't have em' killer packs.

2011-02-24T22:26:00.000+08:00

ah fuck, why oh why must the book be a sequel?

2011-02-24T15:16:00.003+08:00

Yet another Weary Wednesday.

Headed straight to the library after school studied till 6.

Had physics tuition from 7:45pm till 9:45.

Reached home at 11.15

5 hours of studies. I honestly hope I'll see results at the end of the year.

Got most of my common test results back.

Chem- A1

English-D7

Physics-A1

History-A1

Math-A1

Social studies-?

POA-A1

English was pretty fucked up. Very unlike me to fail it at all.

Guess I'll have to buck up on that

2011-02-22T17:10:00.002+08:00

Didn't sleep well last night either, due to the fact I slept 7 hours before hand. Also, that my nose is still not breathing. Just finished cooking my dinner ( boiled pork with spinach) can't wait for Saturday to break my diet.

Anyway, I'm heading down to study and then for a jog.
Posting this to prevent myself from just hitting the sheets.

Give me a sign, yes you.

2011-02-21T22:34:00.006+08:00

Urgh, I feel so sickly tired.

Had my common test today, barely made it through the two papers.

My whole body was rioting against me, started with the my throat leading the strike last night. The wonderful nose of mine decide to go on a holiday and left breathing to my mouth instead. At the same time Mr. Brain had to work overtime all the way till 3. And by 5 this morning, my back caught the mood to riot too and started drumming painful rhythmic beats. Of cos' to end it of my shoulders have to be included too. So they joined in the protest by being really sore.

Took a 7 hour nap once I reached home with the ever present killing throat of mine waking me up every now and then.

Woke up went for a jog after that.

Had my dinner(Stir fried chicken with onions,spinach & butter heads. which wasn't that bad as compared to the usual boiled unsalted breast meat)

INTROSPECTION

2011-02-20T01:01:00.005+08:00

Just like a history essay asking for the pros & cons.

You balance it out.

This is where self pitiful introspections over the past week got me.

I do not deny that I honestly am very regretful for all those silly yet disastrous mistakes I've made.Those that I can never mend and those that'll haunt me down one fine day. Many of those friend whom I took ever so for granted. Not beating around the bush, sometimes I wish I never did screw up us. cos' I don't think I'll get over it any time soon, just like Abby. I don't think I'm gonna find someone that cared as much, not anytime soon.

But,

I don't think I'll have the discipline to push myself to study, to gym, to quit smoking.

This year ain't the year to screw around. I've probably said it a thousand times to myself.

Guess, it was a right move after all. To have a new start this year. To focus on what has to be done rather than what I feel like doing. I'm breaking limits this year.

So,

I conclude that mistakes are a growing process.

Never be afraid to make them. They make you.

Call me Mr. Monk

2011-02-19T18:53:00.005+08:00

Went over to Lui's in the afternoon. We were half way into a show called "Monga",which is about some Taiwanese mafia's/gangsters in the 80s or 90s, when he went "I also have that vest" .

Which led to this mini photo shoot we had.

So first up was his flowery shirt ,white pants, bracelets, rings and mother fucking Nunchucks.

Then we found an empty bottle of whiskey in his cupboard, so a drunkard bump I became.

We later realized that they had necklaces, on went the necklaces and out came the poses they did in the show.

Epic gangster-ism in progress

And finally came the vest and an additional hat.

Thinker?

Or?
Urbane?

Hit the gym after the show.

& thats bout my day.

It's gonna be less studying the coming week since I desperately need to work on my endurance.

A break in momentum

2011-02-15T20:54:00.002+08:00

Guess the whole diet+gym+study+stop smoking got me.

So I fucked the diet, smoked, break my diet and didn't study.

Well, for today. Tomorrow it'll be back on track with everything.

Its 3 days or so to common test.

What a time.

2011-02-14T19:53:00.003+08:00

Haven't done any school work today.

Gotta tune myself up :/

Hear the screams of silent,

2011-02-13T20:10:00.003+08:00

It has been such a tough week.

With the diets, gym , self revision, tuitions and attempts to smoke only two sticks a day.

I'm really in over my head this time and sheeeesh am I mentally fatigued or what?

Feel like smoking and stuffing myself with food.

And not moving a brain cell nor a muscle.

Today, No one's at home.

Dad's in Taiwan.

Mum's in Malaysia.

Bro's in Camp.

So it's home alone and oh so deafening quiet.

2011-02-08T21:45:00.001+08:00

So far, So good.

Stop, Drop & Mother Fucking Scream

2011-02-06T13:37:00.003+08:00

Had a barren fishing trip yesterday.So it got me thinking.

And here I am to set some bench marks for this month.

-Fitness (By second week)

Friday's are also known as fitness days.

To run two sets of 5 rounds instead of the normal warm up.

15 push ups as basic.

8 pull ups to hit.

-Habits

This month is at the humble number two.

Two cigarettes a day at most.

and two days without smoking a week.

-Studies

This is the major pain in the ass but hell,

Stop procrastinating and get tuition for physics.

4 hours of self revision is for at least 6 days a week.

My room is being invaded.

2011-02-03T22:59:00.003+08:00

By the noisiest bunch of cousins I have. With screams that sound like drunkard harpies singing by the rooftops.

Just another one of those spice less recaps.

Woke up in the morning at 8.30. Brought Sammy down for a quick walk while I took a breather.

Changed up & headed over to Grand's.

Ate, sat around, Ate, played Wii , Ate, Ate, Ate, Ate.I was more or less wolfing down anything edible in sight. Headed over to Grand Aunt's. Same thing different place.

Reached home around 4. Took a nap woke up an hour later at 5.

The rest of the relatives came over. Had a Barbecue. Balled for awhile.

Thats bout it

2011-02-02T21:46:00.002+08:00

Had such a bromidic day. Dinner was rather awkward.

Brother was being retarded as usual. Cousin's were insipid through out the whole time.

Guess we're just rather distant. Thats bout it.

How was yours?

Have you ever screamed at yourself for being you?

2011-02-01T23:10:00.002+08:00

It's the eve of Chinese New Year eve.

One of those restless nights, where you're just stoning at home.The weather is pleasantly chilly.

You're pretty tired but sleep just don't seem to be on the agenda .

Visiting and revisiting web pages that are dully dry and rather uninteresting.

You know, just to kill some time, to stay up late?

By the middle of the night you feel really low on spirits.

Fishing out your phone, you wish there was a group of friends around to laugh, sing and make merry for the night?

But instead, no one seems to be close enough to do so and those who do just ain't available? you're on your bed bemoaning about unfortunate events that clearly were your mistakes. Brooding over "what-could-have-been"s.

So, you finally gave up the idea to stay up late. Closing your eyes, you try to sleep.

and ironically, insomnia hits you right smack in the face.

Mocking you with a little self written rhyme. That goes on and on and on.

Till you feel like pounding your pillow flat. Till you feel like lighting a cigarette or another 19 after the first.

Finally the sun awakens and hits the skies, yet, you haven't slept a wink.

There goes a night,spent on brooding.A day spent on sleeping.

2011-01-30T21:58:00.000+08:00

You're leaving again aint you?

2011-01-30T21:46:00.002+08:00

Chinese New Year is a few days away.

Bought my new sneakers and jeans today.

Though, technically, I'm only collect em' jeans on Tuesday.

How you thought something was special.

Or you thought something is different this time round.
Unlike the old musky piece of junk you had.

But, then you go home tear away the decorative ribbons and ever so presentable wrapping paper.

Then you notice' "Oh, wait. Same shit"

And then the same old scenes just replays itself.Like Deja Vu.Finally you realize,This is the same cycle that you promise yourself that you'll never repeat again.OHSNAP.

2011-01-26T21:34:00.002+08:00

Had an absolutely awesome time with Audrey today. On a normal day, my day feels like it ends around 4pm. Today, it started at 3.

Hit woodlands at minute later than I had expected at, 14 51 hours.

Audrey reached a few minutes before I did, and was already at where we suppose to rendezvous.
We went to collect tickets for the show Shaolin. Pretty good a show. It did not disappoint, even though I really expected a movie based on fighting than anything else. Turns out it was more on the subject of Buddhism.

Went to KFC to catch dinner after the movie but the place was jammed packed with people. Decided to have it to go instead. Went back to my condo for our dinner.

Had a lovely cold breeze blowing at us lightly, the air was fresh due to the heavy downpours earlier in the afternoon, And we had our empty tummies. From then on time sped really quickly. We were talking. We were laughing , We were joking. And before we knew it, it was time for us to part.

Audrey, good luck in school.

2011-01-23T21:45:00.003+08:00

Shout out that war cry of yours.
Show no fear to those before.

Scream as you take their lives.

Sing as we raise out spears up high.

Rejoice when we burn them down,
hear the indignant sounds.

See bodies drop before us,
See us foolish foes, See us pass.

2011-01-21T21:16:00.002+08:00

Went to watch the School's Kiwi Cup with Jorren and Wei Kang.
was not as exhilarating as the Police Cup but never the less its fun to cheer and scream and watch .

Then suddenly, the world decides to shit on me.

So fuck, fuck all of you. Strengthening in progress.

2011-01-20T21:56:00.000+08:00

Just another dull "What-I-Did-Today-Post"

Was suppose to stay for extra chinese lessons but the teacher was cranky. so decided to skip home instead. Studied till 530. brought Sammy for a walk. Hit the gym at 7 till 8 30. Started balling till 930.

2011-01-18T21:45:00.005+08:00

You know, sometimes actions displays a clearer image than drawings.

I finally understand where we stand. How you feel about us.

Y'know. I'm not being bitter no more. I came to accept the fact that, you don't give half a fuck.

I've told you, I'll get use to not having you around.

I guess I did after all.

But,

To be very honest to myself and you, I still miss you. I still visit your blog daily to see if you've updated anything. I still jump on to facebook to see if you've left a message.

However,

The clock still ticks, the Earth still orbits and life still goes on. I can't be hanging on a piece of thread waiting for you. Each morning, I wake up slightly less disappointed to not see a miss call or a message from you.Each evening, I feel less trouble that you haven't call for the whole day. And each night I sleep better.

Life has been busy, mundane, boring , hectic but at the same time rather enjoyable. I actually enjoy going to school to give a good 6 hours of serious studying and probably another 3 at home. I feel good about hitting the gym and trying to kick the habit feels equally fantastic.

I've grown quite alot this few weeks. Everything I'm doing now, I actually understand why I'm doing it. Its weird really, It feels as though I've just opened my eyes for the first time.

Guess what I'm trying to say is,
Damn, I finally feel 17.

2011-01-15T21:49:00.004+08:00

A good night's rest. Something I haven't done for the week.
Opening my eyes i noticed "Wait this ain't my room"

My mind was still a blur, what the hell is going on. Those thoughts were cut short as my senses picked up something big, Something wrong.

It stood there behind me, at 3 meter tall. Covered in a dashing display of bright colours.

With claws which made Lions & tigers look like kittens.

Luckily for me, in my younger days, I use to be in alien-creature language & protection school. Where I learnt the way to protect and defend the people around me from Aliens like these.
All my training rushed back into my head and without a second more to waste. I stuck out my tongue raised both my pinkies and cried out " WEZZZUTI ZERK ZERK KIT" Which means " I show no fear, you fucking asshole" The creature made a full 180 degrees turn and sprinted away.

Still feeling rather daze, I made my way to a vintage point to find my bearings and to look out if my family or friends were out there.The climb was a long and hideous one, to make things worse I had no rope nor climbing equipment. I had to improvise. Curling vines together I made a strong and sturdy rope later tying a few of them into a harness.

Reaching the vintage point, I saw my family at different ends.

what I saw next got my adrenalin pumping and my pulse racing, the far north, shaking in fear was my brother(Justin) and cousin (jille). They were almost cornered by what seems like the much feared , Frankenstein . I could hear the thunderous roars of pure inhuman strength as Frankie moved closer and closer, step by step. I made a made dash towards them, only hoping to make it in time.

Frankie was not more than 5 steps away. A 100 meter away I was picking up even more speed.

I almost did not make it. My brother was already turning retarded & Jille had the merciless hands of frankie around his neck. Running up beside him the training I had in the SABAM(School Agaisnt Big Ass Monsters) started replaying in my head. I knew what to do. Then I did it.

In the famous, Men in Black pose, I gave him a WTF look.

He looked at me. I saw, I saw what he normally sees in his victims. FEAR.

Without a warning, He turn and made a run for safety.

Judging the by the position of the sun , we couldn't afford to hunt down the monster.
A waste it was. We started making our way east to the direction of my mother. Only to be stopped by Joker. Pissed was he, when he found out that I had a red 'WTF' Tee shirt and that I had use the WTF look on frankie, his pet.

The Joker threw a series of fast flying poison knifes at us. Instincts reacting like second nature, I threw myself at Jille to get him out of the way.But was unable to safe my brother.

I had to help my brother. Effects of the poison was already hurting him. So I did something no one would, Which I've only heard about it in books and folk tales. The one thing that would stop Joker, I

Put on my Red 'WTF' Shirt and threatened to use the high level technique, LICK.

He cursed at the wind, took out his poker cards. but never once did he take another step closer.

I had won that battle, but with way too much risk than I expected.

We set up camp at a quiet spot. I needed to put my medication skills to use. But first I had to make sure my mother knew where we were. I requested that Jille move silently to the east.

I began working on the wounds where the poison knifes had nested their heads in.
Quickly cleaning and using my awesomeness to get rid of the poison. After a intense session of cleaning and awesome-powering. He was finally good to go again. We packed up ready to head east, but there came a high pitched scream of help.

There It was, Kunpuss Panda swinging an arm at Jille.

Although he dodged it with ease, he did not know that Kunpuss Panda's secret techniques.
We had to do something. With synchronized movements we leapt for the right arm and left leg.

Constraining it from his frenzied attacks at Jille. I used my legs to give him a series of lightning fast kicks to his balls. My efforts ended off with it laying there crying in pain. Guess we could have called Kunpuss panda a him.

The trip to the east was a cold and tried one but, no one else confronted us.
We meet mother half way through out 3rd hour. To our surprise she has already heard the news of my victory.

When we reached town, everything was different. We were famous. The young girls wanted us.

One was especially touchy to my surprise.

And Even the old ones were here to see us.

And if you thought that was freaky, wait till you see our fan-animals.

Even the animals became touchy

At the end of the day we were so famous that the gladiators begged us for a group photo

So, that was my day. Sheeesh I'm tired.

2011-01-14T15:51:00.001+08:00

you did it again.

2011-01-13T21:12:00.003+08:00

Bell, Boday Bi Bwas Bpeaking Bwith 'B' Bin Brount Bof Bery Bwan Bof By Bords.
Well, for recess actually.

The start of everything new means the fall of everything old.

And history showed us exactly what it means.

Like how you can never have fresh water in your cup unless you finish the old stale water?

lolololol, bruce lee shit.

2011-01-11T23:29:00.001+08:00

BUSY. Honeymoon period is over. And its time to start revision . Ah sheesh

2011-01-10T22:22:00.002+08:00

I'll fight my war, but I'll let it kill itself.

DISAPPOINTMENT is todays word.
For instead of getting an A, i got a B.
So, I'm retaking the paper this year.
For, words are becoming less important
And more empty

2011-01-07T19:46:00.002+08:00

haven't heard from you for a good 15 hours now. Just how much is still the same?

You just disappeared as though it was just a dream, as though we never got back.
You left nothing, no notes, no message , no calls, no trace. You never did tell me when we were gonna meet next, or if we are ever again. You never did call me for the whole day. where were you? Did i every cross your mind? While you lingered in mine the whole day? What exciting activities did you have, that made you not call your boy friend? I can't do anything right now. I can't study , I can't ball, I can't gym,I can't laugh, I can't sit and not think about you. I don't feel like doing anything but waiting for you to call. I waited the whole evening. I waited. I did.
I don't know what other way is there to get your attention. Please. you're killing me.

2011-01-07T17:39:00.002+08:00

Cos' I'm sick of calling. I've been calling you since 145.
I'm assuming you weren't at home since i went there to ring your bell too.
and among all those ruckus there was not a single reply.
You disappeared. I have no way of knowing where you are or what you're doing.
I'm sick of hearing the ending beep of the dialing tone.
I have NO WAY OF CONTACTING YOU.

2011-01-07T17:25:00.002+08:00

I rushed home looking, looking for you.
So fast I forgot to check the condo on the way.
I rushed in the house looking,looking for you.
throwing everything on the ground, i almost threw my phone away.
I rushed out looking for you, looking for you
Hoping you're in the condo somewhere.
I came up, hoping for you, hoping for you.
Grabbed my phone & wallet and off i flew.
I rushed over, looking for you, looking for you
Rang the bell like a fool.
I thought of you ever since I left for school.

called you ever since school ended.

Now, I'll try for the last time.

2011-01-06T22:11:00.003+08:00

Now ain't you just the dumbest dumb fuck. This is retarded, Joel.
You gotta toughen up. Starting now. NOW, NOW!
You bloody ass clown. Its just nights away! God damn you, if you can't handle that. I'm ashame of you. Get a grip. You can handle nights alone. You've done it when you were younger.

GROW UP.

Went to Sakura (Admiralty Park) to celebrate Felicia's birthday. The service there was very bad. No one was there to bring us to our table so we were left to try finding our seats till another waiter saw us. Waiters clear plates even before I finish chewing my food(imagine just finishing your chunk of beef and before you even set down your utensils a rude hand appears to grab your plate) . The chiefs there were all black faced as though we've step on their sick and dying mothers by accident. There were house flies around,happily landing on the food occasionally as though that they were guests of the restaurant too. Also staff there looks very unprofessional, with their long dyed hair. (No I'm not saying its wrong, its just not suitable for a job like this)
Overall, I wouldn't return to Admiralty Park Branch. Had a pretty unpleasant time in their restaurant. Well, It wasn't about me today.

Felicia looked gorgeous today. Being the darling she is, she wasn't affected by the crappy service or hygiene standards or my crappy mood.
She took everything with a stride and smiled most of the time. Well, I couldn't really match up with her.

We left around 8. Walked her home as she gonna celebrate it with her family today too.

Thats bout it.

2011-01-05T21:28:00.002+08:00

Was feeling unwell today, so decided to stay at home instead.
Felicia came over yesterday. Was lovely to have her around once again. Although we slept most of the day away.We actually only slept ate and talked our day away. Well, thats fine with me really!
It's her birthday tomorrow, which is why she's so busy with midnight plans and everything with the bars and the drinking.

Well, I'm glad we're back together.

2011-01-04T22:04:00.005+08:00

Sorry by Buckcherry:

Oh I had a lot to say, was thinking on my time away

I missed you and things weren't the same

'Cause everything inside it never comes out right

And when I see you cry, it makes me want to die

I'm sorry I'm bad, I'm sorry I'm blue

I'm sorry about all things I said to you

And I know, I cant take it back.

I know how you kiss, I know all your sounds

And baby, the way you make my world go round

And I just wanted to say, I'm sorry

This time I think, I'm to blame

It's harder to get through the days

You get older and blame turns to shame

'Cause everything inside it never comes out right

And when I see you cry, it makes me want to die

I'm sorry I'm bad, I'm sorry I'm blue

I'm sorry about all things I said to you

And I know, I cant take it back

I know how you kiss, I know all your sounds

And baby, the way you make my world go round

And I just wanted to say, I'm sorry

Every single day, I think about how we came all this way

The sleepless nights and the tears you cried

It's never too late to make it right

Oh yeah

Sorry

I'm sorry I'm bad, I'm sorry I'm blue

I'm sorry about all things I said to you

And I know, I cant take it back

I know how you kiss, I know all your sounds

And baby, the way you make my world go round

And I just wanted to say, I'm sorry

I have always been trying my best not to let her in. While she slowly seeped in through the gaps I never knew was there, I felt that I lost myself. I felt tied down. So I ran, like the coward I was. Ran because I couldn't let anyone waver my decision. Couldn't let someone matter so much. When I finally got want I fought for ( All the wrong reasons), It sucker punched me, knocked the air out of me. Yet, I still did not realize that the void could not be filled with my everyday activities, not with fishing nor training nor fighting & definitely not with a new girlfriend. Every time I stopped keeping myself busy, the musky feeling swarms over me again. Yet, I was oblivious to the fact that the void only appeared because I made her leave. Such a foolish thing it was, as though searching for a last piece that fits your favorite puzzle as you've threw away a piece of it. Today , here I am after losing my one good thing that happened to me every since Abby,realizing my own atrociousness, regretting everything I've done. For when she gave me her heart on a string, I torn it out and spat at it.Not once not twice but many many times. Now I put my heart on a string, She could do the same or even worse, it'd be fair. I'd be hurting but it'd be what i deserve.

I've been an ass.

2011-01-04T15:50:00.006+08:00

Breaths that fights your lungs.

Words that bite your tongue

Laughter that brings extreme pain.

Threads that keep you sane.

Eyes that do not see.

Memories that do not leave.

Steps that go no where.

courage that does not dare.

Thoughts that never stop.

Head that burns so hot.

Seconds that are hardly fast.

Minutes they never pass.

Nights that you dread so much.
Days, apart.

Written on 4/1/2011

2011-01-03T20:30:00.005+08:00

The end of holidays. The start of a new head crushing, brain popping, life style.

Fishing is gonna go to maybe once a month.
Studying is gonna be a everyday thing.
Enjoyment is gonna have to wait. Once again there be looking at calenders marking out the holidays and looking forward to them. Only difference this year. There be no horsing around in school anymore. Its time for O's.

Today was a flooding of emotions. Emotions from the past year which was pushed to the back of my head.Everything came crashing down. The Monday blues & the Sunday blues. The engulfing loneliness which I have gotten so unused to. The thought of waking up at 5 every morning. The thought of heading back to the hectic life. The thought of wrong steps and mistakes. The guilt in the actions I've done which I know I'll never rectify.Gosh, don't I just sound like an emo asstard.

On the brighter-side.

NEW YEAR RESOLUTIONS
To study constantly and not to screw up somewhere there.

To smoke only on occasions which includes the monthly fishing trips
To save up for whatever reason people do it for instead of being ass broke every end of the month.

Lastly if you're still here visiting, I miss you. I'm ashamed to say so but I do.
but this time you won, you stopped caring

2010-12-28T19:23:00.003+08:00

Hasn't it been ages? No? oh its just close to 2 months!
yes, yes, I've been way too lazy to blog about anything.
So lets see where i dropped off. 'O's was relatively easy. well, it was only English and Math.

NOVEMBER

Spent most of my time being with Felicia. With weekly fishing trips.

November more or less flew by.

EPIC NOVEMBER FACE

DECEMBER

Weekly fishing got better with Boon around. More hits, more takes, more landed.
Due to the usage of salmon as bait.

Don't ask why my face looks so chubby, both picture was taken on the same night.

Went back to GraceHaven for Thanks Giving Night.

Was nice to see the few people that really made the run easier. (Teck Chye, Bee & Hazel ect)

Little Stefanie was a shocker.

Grandma is over to stay as the maid went home for a holiday.

So I'm staying at home.

Okay, fine. I haven't been working out or anything. Yes i have a belly. Sheesh, But thats gonna be gone soon. Max has been coming over to work out just have to keep that up. And i'll be more or less fine.School's about to start soon. And 2010 is left with a few days.Now, I'll have to get use to writing 2011 on my dates. and the rest of my 'O's are next year. Sheeeeeeesh, next years gonna be another bumpy ride.

New year resolutions coming up soon.

2010-11-09T02:59:00.000+08:00

Enjoy when right here I am.

Wednesday morning and I'm here like I'm working.

2010-10-20T10:17:00.009+08:00

Okay okay Joel went off to study with Sam near Park Lane so yes I'm here to post for 'im again but guess what the weird thing is I volunteered to do it.

ENTHUSIASTIC WEDNESDAY!

Hope the both of them will be able to sponge all relevant knowledge today, remove all filters from brain and pass with flying colors during the coming week [:

Right the other reason I decided to post for him apart from it being ENTHUSIASTIC WEDNESDAY! is I am about to show you a scarred-for-life gif that will make you shit bricks. Or shit shit, in this case. And here it is... -drumroll-drumroll-drumroll-

If you will kindly click this link so I can syfl: http://lullabiestokill.tumblr.com/post/1350040867
...Seen it yet? Had a massive orgy after looking at it. I mean who wouldn't. Boys...? *Wink wink*

Okay on my part, to motivate Joel and Sam in their studies today (probably wouldn't help but still...), I have decided to post a picture of the most creative angle in Math! Might make your day less boring if you had to do all that crazy Math angle shit. Also because I was telling Joel about it last night so here's a picture to prove my point.

I have also managed to clear all my folders and documents and label them properly in folder after folder while Joel studied at my place yesterday. Now my files are neat and pretty and properly labeled! I swear I have a ton of crazy funny fun gross pictures in 'my documents'.

Hell I even have a folder labeled "nothing much but girls that are just pretty or nude"

And there is a Joel folder in 'my documents' too. He is filling into my life. And my computer. Great so chances are I might see him tonight. I need to finish watching Family Guy Season 8. Yes once again Joel gets the blame for causing me to be addicted to said series. Lol am I like keeping this blog sunny and alive or what. Kudos to myself. Kudos for Joel for being so busy I am like almost obsessed with posting on his blog.

Swear. I. Will. Do. A. Nude. Chick. Spam. The. Next. Time. Round.

Cheers, Felicia.

Joel is so hectic he is a fish out of water.

2010-10-19T15:52:00.005+08:00

Hi I'm here to post on Joel's site because he forced me into it.
This is undoubtedly my best picture. This, here, below ---->

.... No I'm kidding. About the picture I meant. What, you thought I'd be kidding about Joel forcing me to post than me actually being a sloth?

Anyway about Joel, he took my objections as if they were invisible and promptly announced that I would do it because he asked with a please and such. Then he went back to his books, leaving me feeling quite forlorn. So yes I'm here. Really have no idea what to talk about but maybe I'd get used to it so I'll try my best with this post.

Hm so Joel's been having intensive studying for these few days. Trying to complete as much studies as he can get done. He's been working on Mathematics a lot. Trying to sponge calculations up into his mind. And in the midst, ~jang jang jang~... I have fully faded into oblivion. I was joking. So yes he's hoping to score god damn well in his English and Math exams which will happen on the 26 and 27 respectively, I think.

I personally hope he will be able to do incredibly well so that it would justify the time that wasn't spent with me but on his books after this long while LOL.

Otherwise I'd be like

Actually there really isn't much to talk about. I wish he had picked a few better days for me to blog for him because he's been doing so much studying and there really isn't much going on a part from that and the occasional family drama. (And I was telling a friend of mine how I felt like my boyfriend died lmao) But of course he's right here and I'm right here and we'll still be here. Like hell I know what I'm talking about.

In a nutshell, Joel is so busy he's dissipating.
... Still kidding.
Okay will blog when he wants me to. Must be pretty amusing to have someone blog for you about you on your site. Like an alternative author. Makes me wonder. I just might get him to do it too.

Cheers, Felicia.

2010-09-29T17:47:00.002+08:00

Radios rust and speakers spoils.
Songs of a million mistakes, useless they lie.
Phone line cables, torn and dropped off.
Millions of heavy digits dialed,yet,unable to call.
Internet, world wide web, crashed and decayed.
Once again million of gallons of water, yet to be displayed.

2010-09-28T14:49:00.003+08:00

You're not gonna explain anything? Don't you see that's why this is happening.
Cause you don't explain! Cos you leave things hanging.

Time to go for a crazy mug trip.
Bye comp.

2010-09-27T23:22:00.003+08:00

You know, I'm pretty sick of those"Some where in the middle answers".
From the trivial things like what do you want to eat to the, major ones like do you want to take your Os. And FUCK, I only ask this questions because I'm concern.

Like honestly how does it affect me that you decide to stone outside,alone or not?It doesn't rip a piece of my flesh nor does it poison me. Then why did i ask? Because you said you were feeling unwell & all I requested was for you to head home to rest. What was your answer? NOTHING.
Except for a sign of irritation. I tried again later, another one of those famous " I don't know".
You're a strong, stone cold person, fine, I will not be concerned bout the next time you decide not to head home in the middle of the night.

How does it affect me that you take your 'O's or not? It doesn't. I'm asking because I don't want to see you waste everyday of your life. Sleeping, waking, using the com, chilling out. Yes, a waste! Don't blame me, this is all I have been seeing from you. Without the mention of anything that is constructive to yourself.
Oh, you might now feel that I don't understand you? Well, maybe its because you never did give me a solid answer. All I get from you when I bring up this topic is irritation or, neither here nor there answers. Yes, you've told me once, that you have your own plans and you're working on it but just not now.
you do not share it with your parents, I understand, communication break down. You do not share it with your other friends, fine, you want to achieve it before you tell them. But even for me, you do not share it. And you honestly think that I would not have my doubts?Doubts because I am concerned. Fine, I will not bring this matter up ever again.

How does it affect me if the situation at home gets better for you? I don't benefit from anything that happens at your home, do I? So why do even bother to talk to your parents?Why do I even want to be a middle man for you?Well, once again because I am concern. But what do I get in return? More signs of irritation.

Just like how Sammy learns not to do certain thing because she gets a smack when she does it? Well I'm learning to be less concerned. This is not a threat, I don't do threats. This is what is happening.

Honestly speaking, I find it harder for me to believe you, though true enough, there be a chance what you say its all true. but things just adds up.

First, it was what you told Anson, the 3k pay coming in? plan for any offshore trip we want?
C'mon, Whats your explanation for that? And if, IF, it was a lie. Why?
Then, followed by the you dropped out of school at secondary two and started a free lance internet business. But i so daringly conclude that you dropped out of school at the start of secondary 4 due to bad grades. So, if what i conclude is true, WHY?
I'm unsure about this but, you told me once you danced for years or one year? With training after trainings that you could have time for fun. Why did your mum say differently?I'm sure she can't mistake a year for 2 months or so. So if your mum did not get the facts wrong why?

Lastly, When i keep quiet doesn't mean I know nuts about something.
It irritates the fuck out of me when you put on that I-know-it-all attitude.
I don't say things too often, doesn't mean I'm a fool.
When i joke and make stupid comments, doesn't mean that I'm a retard.
Don't roll your eyes , when I'm trying to lighten the mood.
Signs of irritation , signs of irritations. That's all i get from you.
You talk to his brother better than you talk to your boy friend.
IRONIC.

you know what? HERE'S my sign of irritation.

2010-09-19T22:55:00.002+08:00

Why the fuck must you be hostile to your boy friend over such little things like "joey" .
Couldn't you say I don't know? Oh yeah, so i saw wrongly its Felicia who got 55 points for the game & Joey who got 52. Major screw up huh? must harp on things like that huh?

Before i went out of the room, i was like Felicia Man U is on. How is that not inviting you to head out to watch it with me? But no, what was your reaction? Nothing. whats that called? Ignoring.
Oh wait. Think about it, If i ignored you when you're talking to me, guess you'll just smile and forget about it? i doubt so.

I waited for you at the living room, hoping you'll come out of the room.
BUT, NOOOOO.
Oh yeah, I'm totally interested in soccer that is why I was in the living room.

I went into the room see you're watching it on the computer.
I invited you to watched outside with me.
You mumbled something. I didn't catch it.
You rolled your eyes and say forget it.
I asked you again. You did the Oh-so-often ignoring process again.

After the game, I sent you down.
We took a smoke. The only thing you said to me was,"I want to call Maggie" + "call maggie at 1130 for me".
No bye, no nothing. No questions about when we gonna meet again, nope.

I'm sure you have a million points to debate the things I've said. You're the one who's always right after all. I'm always the guy who doesn't take hints, the fair weather lover, the ass hole who takes flight when problem comes. Sure I'm the kind.
Cos, you know, I have never asked you whats wrong? and you have always told me whats bothering you. I've never asked if you wanted me to stay with you and you've never give me an answer that keeps me hanging in the air. Nope, never & Yes, always.

Oh why am I such a bad bitch of a boyfriend huh?

2010-09-08T00:33:00.002+08:00

Wow, i only showed you the blog post while smiling like an idiot because i found what i wrote really funny. I actually cooled down? wow

wow wow wow wow wowwow wow wow wow wowwow wow wow wow wowwow wow wow wow wowwow wow wow wow wowwow wow wow wow wowwow wow wow wow wowwow wow wow wow wowwow wow wow wow wowwow wow wow wow wowwow wow wow wow wowwow wow wow wow wowwow wow wow wow wowwow wow wow wow wowwow wow wow wow wowwow wow wow wow wowwow wow wow wow wowwow wow wow wow wowwow wow wow wow wowwow wow wow wow wowwow wow wow wow wowwow wow wow wow wowwow wow wow wow wowwow wow wow wow wowwow wow wow wow wowwow wow wow wow wowwow wow wow wow wowwow wow wow wow wowwow wow wow wow wowwow wow wow wow wowwow wow wow wow wowwow wow wow wow wowwow wow wow wow wowwow wow wow wow wow

just great. pissed huh?

2010-09-07T23:49:00.004+08:00

Shheeesh, lets go maybe it is a whinny day after all.

To question One.
It was half because he was busy cooking for you?
Would you think i wouldn't want to sit down and cuddle with you?
And it's a big big difference between half and a whole horror movie?
Okay, next time I'll just cook for you, maybe then It'll be 2 thirds of a movie.
Right, then you'll argue, "you can always just cook for yourself, no one said I'm hungry"
Maybe some appreciation would be nice? Whats more, i was the one who kept asking you to watch the next show. You were the one who kept running back in here to use the com.

To question Two.
My dad asked me to clear it because its common courtesy for me to. Since his not a maid or man servant. I came in going "Darling....." with a intention of telling you that I have to sleep with my brother tonight since mummy was being pissy.
But you then went on about, "Don't Darling me"
I told you," i just got scolded by my dad because of hair", because i remember telling you this afternoon about how my dad notices the hair. I had no intention of asking you to clear it up or asking you to go “STOP HAIR, STOP FALLING RIGHT NOW STICK ON STICK ON STICK ON”

To question Three.
I'm sorry did i not in the end let you have it instead?

"Real mature. Real mature. Good make sure you remember what’s yours. Because for all you know I’ll be readying tiny little sticky post it notes with “Joel’s property” and “Felicia’s property” on everything."

“It’s, my, Ipod!”

I was kidding. Or is that what only immature people do?
oh, yeah right post it notes.
Cos I'm the selfish Son-of-a-bitch. Who never thinks about others accept himself of cos.
And i never enjoyed sharing with you or anyone else to be exact. You had to beg me for me to share anything of mine. All because, Yes I'm gonna repeat it, I'm a selfish son of a bitch.
Yes, Darling. Oh wait, im doing the Darling thing again ain't I?

What about a pissy night instead?

2010-09-02T18:39:00.001+08:00

You know shit is going down. You know it well.

2010-08-30T13:00:00.002+08:00

I'm not a rich kid. I don't know fancy places or own big fast cars.Maybe will never in my life.
I'm not a brilliant mind. Maybe slightly less than average.
I'm can't study. I don't score straight As.
I can't fight too well. I'm not trained as a Pro.
I'm not fit nor am I bulked.
I don't have rock hard abs nor do i have bulging biceps.
I can't run marathons. I can't lift hundreds and hundreds of pounds.
I'm not & I can't.
I'm just me.

2010-08-29T22:43:00.002+08:00

Something's off and I know it.
Something not right & he knows it too.
something.& We're gonna bloody hell find out real soon

Ah, the comfort of one's own room.
Yes, Aunt moved out. Like finally. Though now the house is kind of quiet.
Fel's been over since uh? I don't know. It's nice spending time with her.
Just makes me wonder if I'm neglecting studies, fitness, whats not.
Oh, well. Joel, Joel.

2010-08-25T21:30:00.000+08:00

Tell me, removal of strings? cos, you act that way.